perplexed - why is my husband getting email from questionable web sites?

marcela lowe

New Email
I just found my husband viewing "questionable" sites. Of course we fought. He told me that he receives "e mails from individuals" that send him videos of themselves. He showed an e mail from an individual that did this. How could this individual find out his e mail? could have chatted with someone online and perhaps this way they got his e mail address? Apparently he has been receiving these e mails for years? do these e mails get sent for that long without any response?
 
Re: perplexed

It sounds like he is receiving spam emails and opening them instead of deleting them. If you give your email address to some sites, they will sell them to spammers and that is how they could end up in his inbox. Most people know better than to click them. Most are full of viruses. I notice that you mentioned two potential problems.
1. You caught him viewing questionable sites
2. he is receiving and opening emails from people that he doesn't know. (most likely the woman depicted in pictures and videos isn't even the one behind sending the emails in the first place.) It is probably some hairy, greasy 300 pound guy that is trying to get your husband to pay for online porn sites or something of that nature.

I was married to someone that went to "questionable sites" on a regular basis. We had an understanding before we got married that I was not cool with that. He did it anyway and ended up being the root that broke up our marriage.

I refuse to back down on this issue and would NEVER be with a guy that did stuff like that. He needs to decide what is more important "questionable sites" or your marriage. Good luck with everything. Keep us posted. (you can send me a private message if you would like)
 

popowich

EQ Forum Admin
Staff member
Re: perplexed

Hello,

You know your husband better than everyone else.

Yes, it's possible he is getting spam emails.

In response to beentheredonethat's second point I think the word "claims" should be added - he claims he does not know them.

It could be spam, it could be a dating or adult web site.

Was the email From: a well known adult / dating web site (bad for him) or was it From: a fake domain or a free email account (more likely to be random spam), or from personal email accounts?

Also, why is he opening them and clicking links instead of deleting the emails?

I hope thinking about the above points helps you to figure out the truth
 

marcela lowe

New Email
First, of all I would like to thank those who took the time out to respond my question. This topic has left me quite drained.
I am not sure if was free domain or a free e mail account that the questionable e mail came from. All I noticed is that where it said, where the message was from was that it had a last name ( "Tu.......") and what the message was concerning was that it said "how are you?" My husband said that he gets many messages from his friends that have subject matters that start out this way. It's something that you would say to a friend. He said that this is why he opened it.
 

butterflycc

New Email
My boyfriend's done the same thing. He claims all the mail he gets is junk mail. But I caught him having profiles on the sites. How? By going to the sites, creating a profile (fake of course) and looking him up by any information I know (zip code, date of birth, etc). And there he would be. He gave me the password to one of them so that I could delete the profile/account since he claims not to know how to delete them. But the password wasn't the same for all the others and he claims not to remember them. He says he had to join to get points for Mafia Wars. That doesn't sound right because I've played and never did I have to go to such sites to get points. The iPhone is where he does the most damage. But he says, "It doesn't mean anything."
 

popowich

EQ Forum Admin
Staff member
Are they using your computer? I'm not sure how computer savvy these guys are but would you be able to install a program such as Net Nanny on a shared computer to monitor their web site visits? If you turn off the content filters and just use the behind the scenes logging features so there is nothing in their face to tip them off you might be able to get the proof you need to make more certain decisions. Then again, when in doubt, go with your gut to begin with. I do not recommend installing monitoring software on a computer that doesn't belong to you.
 

Email Help

Valued Member
If you have learned more about your situations and would like to share about real problems found vs. regular spam received please reply here or a related discussion such as:

 
My husband has been getting emails like that too and some of them as soon as I open the email it shows “ name” uploaded a new naked picture or comes with a from@gigaoptic.com email I’m not sure if that’s fake or not but I really want to know if this means he is registered because I am not ok with that also some of the emails have been opened by him so also makes me wonder why he doesn’t just delete them or unsubscribe if they are unwanted
 

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